Bob Geldof with George W. Bush in Africa

This is just unbelievable. Bush can utter a coherent sentence sometimes! I am shocked.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/africa/article3510768.ece

Spaz does not find this the least bit funny however. I know she's right, but I couldn't help giving you reason to giggle.

Letter to the Friend Who Could Have Been

I may not have seen you- really seen you and not the social facade - in years, but I know this will not go unappreciated. I know that even if you don't necessarily want to see or hear anything at this moment, on some level your consciousness craves every remaining gesture of love and human kindness left on this earth. God is not kind or loving today. I cannot know how difficult this must be, but I know that it cannot be anything less than the most difficult moment of your existence.

I pray you will find some comfort in these words, as simple and common as they may be. May you always remember the happy moments, not wallow in the what ifs that will surely haunt you. May you celebrate his life, the life you shared and cherish, not mourn his death. As terrible and untimely as it is. May you stand together in familial solidarity, not dissipate in blame and grief.

I wish you strength, though I do not doubt your courage. I wish you patience, though I do not doubt your steadfast will. I wish you closure, though I know this may not be in your immediate future. But I know your core and I know you will overcome this. I do not know you today, but I know your foundations. I know what made you. I know You.

I believe in who you must have become to be the beacon of strength I watched today. I do not pretend to still be a friend. I know a shared past does not guarantee a shared present or future. Today we are merely acquaintances. But we shared a childhood. We share memories of Nutella sandwiches. We share memories of Sister Act and dancing to Michael Jackson's "Black and White". It was my first time listening to him. I remember how grown up you seemed as you sang deftly along and sashayed to his infectious beat. So adult with your entire day older than my own seven years. They say a day older in age is a year older in maturity. Well, you certainly seemed seventeen, not seven, then. I saw it then.

I saw who you would become. I saw wisdom and intelligence beyond your years. I saw wit and speed I could only dream of possessing. I saw the grace and determination you continue to plow through the world with. I saw the tools you need to survive this. You have the tools to survive this. You will. Never doubt your ability to persevere, to heal, to prosper.

And know that even though time and distance have come between us and robbed us of the friendship that may have been, we share that childhood. I will always be your friend. And I will always be here if you need me.

Happy Thoughts

Don't you just love it that after a long, grueling and emotionally difficult day someone comes along and makes everything worthwhile?

I had one of those days.

This is a shout-out to Sunshine, who managed to make me the happiest I've been in forever from a million miles away. You never fail to make my heart soar.

I miss you!

Out of the Mouths of Babes

This is just too good not to share. The two-year-old daughter of family friends (family consisting of the parents and three boys aged 24, 23 and 17) walks out of her room in just her tights and a shirt. Her mother scolds her telling her not to walk around like that, and to go inside and put her skirt on.

The kid looks up at her mother with her humongous hazel eyes and very seriously sighs and says, "seebini ahawy bee-da-ny." [let me air my balls out].

Note the pronunciation of "bee-da-ny".

Priceless.

February One-Liners

Nes's reaction after I explained that my boss was out all week with Epstein-Barr virus, which involves fever, fatigue, inability to concentrate, etc...

Nesticleez: lol, I thought that was called Sunday morning

Roonies: PLANETS MAKE BABIES!!!!!!

Male lead in 27 Dresses: Marriage is entry into the last legal form of slavery.

It's Bissextile Day!

I like life's little quirks. They provide extra reasons to smile and act silly. So this post will honour Leap Day by providing you with some things you thought you didn't need to know about the Gregorian calendar’s more ingenious moments:

As most people know, the leap day was invented because the Earth's orbit around the Sun does not take 365 days, it takes 365.24219 days, meaning we lose about a quarter of a day each year. This throws the seasons of kilter because the lost time adds up. When Julius Caesar first suggested the extra day every fourth year in 45 B.C., he made up for this discrepancy in the short(ish) term, but essentially added an extra 11 minutes to each year. This meant that by the mid-16th Century, they had an extra 10 days to deal with - this threw the world into quite the conundrum, as what could they do with all that time? Where would Easter go? What do you mean, there's no Christmas in 1582? Who knew the calendar could be so confusing?

Then came along Pope Gregory XIII who decided the best way to fix the problem was to remove the leap year from most turn of the centuries, meaning that only centuries divisible by 400 would be 366 days long. So 1600, 2000, 2400, etc... would get leap years, but not 1700, 1800 or 1900. With me so far? Yes, I'm lost too, but onward we shall strive.

By doing so, the calendar would only gain 27 seconds a year (being 365.2425 days long) meaning it would take 2,880 years for another day to be necessary. Hence, the inception of today's Gregorian calendar.

Whew. That hurt my mathematically incompetent brain. And my Google skills.

Now for some Leap Day trivia:

A leap day falls thirteen times on a Sunday, Tuesday or Thursday; fourteen times on a Friday or Saturday; and fifteen times on a Monday or Wednesday.

In Gilbert and Sullivan's operetta The Pirates of Penzance, poor Frederic, who is born on February 29th, is apprenticed to pirates until his 21st birthday. Due to the fact that it only arrives every 4 years, he is forced to wait until his 84th birthday to finally leave and propose to his lady love, Mabel. The stupid woman actually waited that long. Bah, humbug.

Sadie Hawkins day (where women pursue men) originated in 5th century Ireland, when St. Patrick set February 29th as the day women were allowed to ask men to marry them after St. Bridget complained that women had to wait too long to get their way. This was revived in 1288 by Queen Margaret. If the man refused, his fine was a kiss, a silk dress, or a pair of gloves.

On the flip side, the Greeks believe marriage during a leap year is bad luck.

The Savoy Hotel invented the Leap Day cocktail in 1928:

2 oz gin
1/2 oz Grand Marnier
1/2 oz sweet vermouth
1/4 oz fresh lemon juice

Stir and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Serve with a twist of lemon.

With that, I bid you adieu with a toast to Leap Day!

AUC = Detroit, Apparently

A friend called me up this morning with the following story:

A meek-looking black veiled study-abroad is sitting alone. Up limps another meek-looking black veiled girl.
Girl 1 looks up, smiles, and says: YO YO YO MA N****!
Girl 2: WASSUP! MAN, THIS LANGUAGE [Arabic] IS WHACK, YO!
They continue to curse, limp, and act all ghetto.
My friend stares, gob-smacked. Culture shock in reverse.

The End.