The Proper Way to Eat Rice

First, let us set the scene:

Picture a bright, creme coloured dining room with about 8 large round dining tables, seating about 10 each. Picture a semi-filled table seating me, Mile-A-Minute, and 5 strangers, about to tuck into our lunch. 

Now picture me removing a piece of chicken from a skewer with my knife. Note that there is a large spoonful of rice two centimetres away from said knife action. 

As you can probably foresee, I now ask you to picture said knife slipping off the chicken and slamming into the helping of rice, sending most of the rice flying off my plate and scattering it all over the table. 

Now picture three waiters tutting over a plainly embarrassed Eureka and hurriedly cleaning the table up. All I could do was sheepishly keep eating. The rest of the people on the table pretended not to notice anything at all, which obviously made it all the more cringe-worthy. 

Props to the waiters, though. They cleaned my mess up in 4 nanoseconds flat. 

Remind me never to eat at any work-related function ever again. My bruised ego couldn't handle another dining etiquette castrophe.