Makes You All Warm and Fuzzy Inside

I spilt steaming hot chocolate on my keyboard today.

Rather than panic and scramble to clean it up before the keyboard started simultaneously smoking due to short-circuiting and melting due to the near-boiling liquid eating away at its innards, I decided to observe – much like a scientist conducting an immensely important experiment in a controlled environment.

Today’s experiment proved a long held suspicion of mine.

Hypothesis: hot chocolate is God. Or at the very least, it is a universal healer.

Result: the keyboard did not short-circuit. It did not melt (although I think even I would have, it was scorching). Instead, it sang. It opened its hidden plastic mouth and burst out in song, in a voice so harmonious even the Vienna Boys’ Choir would have felt just a teensy bit envious. To my privileged ears only, it let out a divine Hallelujah that could only have come from some supernatural being blessed with some awesome lungs and an awe-inspiring mezzo soprano. My keyboard should hit up American Idol. It would win and make me a gazillionaire.

Conclusion: Yes, hot chocolate is an out-of-this-world creation that could only have come from a superior being. It is a magical substance that can cure the world’s ills, discover new frontiers, write the perfect novel, and still make it home in time to feed the kids, clean the house from top to bottom, and give the spouse the best night of his or her life.

Because hot chocolate is the source of world peace. It even turns Chuck Norris into Santa Claus.

Ergo, hot chocolate is to be revered, worshipped, made idols of and danced around in frilly cream tutus. Then we must all sit by the fire wrapped in warm blankets as we sip this indescribably indecently yummy substance and sing kumbaya.

Amen.