Idiot Box

Now usually, I'm a patient person. I have no problem queuing at the drug store. I have no problem giving pedestrians the right of way. Even the little old lady who takes a good 15 minutes to come down from the pavement, then helps her even smaller husband and his cumbersome cane. I can wait if the valet takes a little longer than usual bringing me my car. And the mid-season hiatus most shows take doesn't bother me, all because I know that everything will go my way eventually.

Patience is a virtue.

But this writer's strike? Now that's more than I can take.

This uncertainty is killing me. I might have to wait till 2009 to find out what happens next on Desperate Housewives, Weeds, Nip/Tuck, Dirty Sexy Money, Grey's Anatomy, Dexter, Prison Break, Private Practice, 30 Rock, Heroes, One Tree Hill, Scrubs, and Gossip Girl, just to name a few.

I'll have finished all my trusty reruns in the first two months of waiting.

This can't be happening to me. Make it stop.

I never used to be like this. I was the occasional Friends watcher. I rarely watched TV. Didn't have the time, really. But then these new shows started to trickle into my system. First it was the O.C. yes, I'm not afraid to admit it. Then it was Prison Break. Then, before I knew what hit me, McGrey's brought in a flood of 15+ shows.

Now I need my shows at lunch, at dinner, in the bathroom, in the car, at the bar, at my best friend's wedding, at my grandfather's funeral, and in bed with me.

I even have a colour-coded schedule for when each episode airs.

My name is Eureka, and I am addicted to my TV characters.

Studios, pay the writers for the worlds they have created. You'd have nothing without their genius.

Please.

I want to live vicariously through my TV characters again.