I am vulnerable. I am fragile. I am afraid. I am heartbroken at the prospect of solitude. I mask my emotions with an air of indifference. Of easygoing nonchalance. But it is a lie. I am lonely. I am. I want your arms to wrap around me in protection. I want to feel your heartbeat harmonize with mine. I want to enjoy the timbre of your voice as it jovially mocks my clumsiness. I want someone else's tomorrow. I want that tomorrow to be my own.
I do not as for or expect a fairytale. I do not require perfection. I require my own version of it. I require happiness. I require respect. I require conversation and intellect. I require a challenge. I require laughter. But above all, I require honest, reinforced, requited love and devotion.
I only ask for what anyone deserves. I do not ask for the extraordinary. That I can create within my ordinary. I want to know that this is not an impossibility. That it is not a dream. I want to know that this is going to happen. I want it to happen. I want it today. I want it to be my own and not my vicarious existence through a stranger or the imaginary. Because life is not meant to be lonely. Life is meant to be mine.
I do not need you to navigate through the waters. I do not need you to row my boat for me. I merely ask for your companionship and encouragement when the waters become choppy and the fog obstructs my vision.
You are not a necessity but a pleasure.
Where is this? Who is it? When will it finally reveal itself? When will my tomorrow come?
14 years ago
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