Partying on the Wrong Side of Town

You'd think having lived in Cairo for just about my entire life, I'd have a basic understanding - if not actual working knowledge - of its main streets. Cairo is too large and discombobulating for one to be well versed in every nook and cranny, but main streets are pretty easy... You'd think.

Thursday night proved that I am either a complete and total mindless goof, or totally clueless when it comes to Cairo's streets. I am, in fact, both.

A couple of friends and I decided to go to a party at the Four Seasons in Garden City and met up at our usual haunt for pre-party drinks. About an hour later, O called saying he was on his way and would meet us at the Four Seasons. We got into our respective cars. I told my driver to take me to the Four Seasons.

Here I must interrupt our little story for an explanatory note. Cairo has two Four Seasons; one hosts a club/lounge I often frequent, the other one of the two department stores my mother and I shop at. The former is in Giza, the latter in Garden City. Two completely different areas of Cairo.

Now where was I? Leaving La Bodega. This is in Zamalek, which is near the Four Seasons I wanted to go. My driver asks me, "which of the Four Seasons are we going to?"

I confidently reply, "the one in Giza where 35 is."

For reasons only a psychiatrist could come up with, I was absolutely convinced - even when saying the name of the club instead of the store - that I was right.

I remained convinced as I saw the club itself. I was certain as I asked the concierge where the party was, even though I knew it was in the store itself. For some reason, my mind refused to register my error.

The poor concierge looked at me quizzically, and asked which party I meant. As I said, "Why the Beymen one, of course," it began to hit me that I may - just maybe - be at the wrong hotel. The man looked at me pityingly but kindly. "Mademoiselle, you are at the wrong Four Seasons."

"Ah. Yes. My mistake. Thank you very much." With my tail between my legs, I skulked off to a corner and called my driver.

Finally, a little past midnight, I arrive at the party. No problems at the door, my name was on the list. Wouldn't have been too surprised if it hadn't been though, given the way the night was going.

Party was very well put together. Hats off. However, can't say the same for the ambiance. Best description of the night came from a girl I do not know talking to her friend as they waited for their car as we left, "the music was great, the bar was great, the decorations were great. So what was wrong? The people were all constipated."

Welcome to Cairo, the city that never sleeps. Because everyone is up, constipated.